Lions And Lions And Lions, Oh My!

 

 

The people of Austria-Hungary, whose place among the nations we wish to see safeguarded and assured, should be accorded the freest opportunity to autonomous development.

[I include the point above for reasons you'll see Friday. And I reproduce the last Sunday School play I've written for the 2013-14 year the day after its last – that I know of! – based on Daniel 6 because you may understand me a little better after reading it. I know I moan sometimes, but writing and its process is sort of cathartic for me; I work out my frustrations and interconnect pop culture and eternal truth. Witness the names of Daniel's fellow ministers that come from Esther, and the title of Scene VI. But hey, if it helps the story and Daniel as an example of sticking with following God even when it is hard to do, then I am happy to share it. – David]

LIONS AND LIONS AND LIONS, OH MY!

DANIEL, prophet of God, noble of Judah, third ruler of Babylon, president of Persia

KING DARIUS, ruler of Persia

BIGTHANA, a president (in the sense of “presiding officer”) over Persia

TERESH, another president

HATACH, a prince

MERES, another prince

LION, king of beasts

ANGEL sent by God

SCENE I – A day in the king's palace.

DANIEL, BIGTHANA, TERESH, HATACH, and MERES stand stage right, and KING DARIUS is “seated” stage left. DANIEL is on the far left of the assembly, and while everyone is looking outwardly respectful all but DANIEL are not nice.

KING DARIUS: (rising from throne stage left) We're gathered here today to honor a man who has come a long way, from being a prince of Judah to becoming the third ruler of Babylon for one night, and now courtesy of his God (all save DANIEL and KING DARIUS cringe) he has continued to serve and continued to thrive in Persia. Now I want –

(PRESIDENTS and PRINCES groan; they all know what KING DARIUS is going to say.)

KING DARIUS: Daniel to take charge over all of you! Daniel, come forward!

DANIEL comes to center stage and bows to KING DARIUS.

KING DARIUS: Daniel, my friend, I want you (KING DARIUS points to DANIEL) to preside over all Persia. You'll be second only to me!

BIGTHANA and the others gape with their mouths wide open, and scene ends.

All puppets leave stage.

SCENE II – That night.

BIGTHANA, TERESH, HATACH, and MERES still have their mouths wide open. Then BIGTHANA shuts his mouth, moves to center stage, and faces the others.

BIGTHANA: (to others) Ok, guys

They do not move.

BIGTHANA smacks them – THE PUPPETS, NOT THE ACTORS! – on the backs of their heads and they close their mouths. Then he turns to face them again.

BIGTHANA: Guys! Daniel has been getting all the praise, all the rewards, all the credit from Darius, and I'm not gonna take it anymore!

TERESH: Yeah, me neither! (raises his fist)

HATACH: Count me in! (grins)

MERES: Me too, guys – but I'm thinking,

BIGTHANA: (aside) That's dangerous.

MERES: (to the others, advancing to center stage as he speaks) that maybe if we did our jobs like Daniel does we'd have the praise, the rewards, and the credit Daniel does –

TERESH: (cuts in) that he makes no big deal of, and we … probably would.

MERES: (continues) EXCUSE ME, but –

Others look at him and frown.

MERES: (sheepishly) Yeah, we need to get Daniel out of the way. (Growls to BIGTHANA and they all huddle.) So what's the plan?

BIGTHANA: What can we turn him in for? Daniel does all the right things, says all the … SAYS

BIGTHANA turns away and rubs his hands together. Then he turns back to the others and they whisper in a huddle.

TERESH: (BIGTHANA snaps around to look at him) OOH, that look in your eye!

BIGTHANA: (to others) Every day Daniel prays to his God, right?

HATACH: That's right.

BIGTHANA: And we want to encourage Darius that he leads the people, right?

MERES: (with hesitation): That's … right

BIGTHANA: We want all the people to look up to Darius for all their needs, right?

TERESH: Ok … where are we going with this?

All puppets leave stage.

SCENE III – Later that day.

BIGTHANA and ALL BUT DANIEL face KING DARIUS center stage.

BIGTHANA: (to KING DARIUS) Your Majesty, what a great idea!

TERESH: (to KING DARIUS) I'm so glad you thought of it, Your Majesty!

HATACH: And all our people could benefit from looking up to you,

MERES: Which they should already … but …

(MERES approaches KING DARIUS and lowers himself.)

MERES: We have a decree, my king.

HATACH: A decree for you to sign

TERESH: that for the next thirty days

BIGTHANA: nobody pray to any god or man

ALL BUT KING DARIUS: but YOU, O king!

BIGTHANA: Let everybody in your kingdom

TERESH: praise you their king

MERES: by this law that can't be undone

HATACH: or be thrown to the lions!

LION roars offstage.

All puppets leave stage.

SCENE IV – The next day.

DANIEL is brought downcast before KING DARIUS on stage left by BIGTHANA, TERESH, MERES, and HATACH from stage right.

KING DARIUS: Daniel, my friend, what's happened?

DANIEL: (with no fear) Your Majesty, I was praying to God to prepare for the day

BIGTHANA: (interrupting DANIEL) See! He confesses it right there!

TERESH: My king, you did sign the law

MERES: That anyone praying to god or man

HATACH: but you, Your Majesty,

ALL BUT DANIEL AND KING DARIUS: would be thrown into the den of lions!

KING DARIUS realizes he's been tricked; this was just an excuse to get rid of DANIEL.

BIGTHANA: And even the king is not above the law.

TERESH: That would set such a bad example

MERES: As our tsk dear friend Daniel has

HATACH: In not praying to you for ONE MONTH!

ALL BUT DANIEL AND KING DARIUS shake their heads.

KING DARIUS: You are dismissed (everyone leaves) all but you, Daniel! (DANIEL stops.) Daniel, face me. You have to go to the lions' den, but there is no law saying who brings you there.

KING DARIUS and DANIEL slowly walk off stage.

LION roars.

SCENE V – In the lions' den, that night.

LION approaches slowly from stage left, DANIEL remains standing on stage right. He does not move.

DANIEL: My God, my God, You have not forsaken me. King Darius believes You will deliver me, and I believe You will deliver me from the lions' mouths. It's only for one night …

LION: (growls and says) Oh, a lot can happen in one night!

DANIEL: (to LION) I don't mean to offend, but only one lion?

LION: (to DANIEL) Budget cuts. (LION sighs) Even empires have limits. Now if you want to run, go ahead … just makes the prey tastier!

ANGEL appears center stage between DANIEL and the LION. LION tries to get around angel, leap over him, but LION is blocked at every turn.

LION: (to ANGEL) Get. Out. Of. My. Way. I'm the king of beasts!

ANGEL: (to LION) I serve the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Your argument is invalid.

LION backs up.

LION: (to ANGEL) But I'm (drawn out) hunnnnnnnngry! (pleading) Can you tell God to rain some manna in here? Please?

ANGEL: (to LION) I will talk to Him. But you (emphasizing each word) Can't. Touch. Daniel. God is his judge.

LION: (grunts) All right. (LION backs to the edge of stage left.)

DANIEL moves to center stage.

SCENE VI – The undiscovered country.

DANIEL is center stage and KING DARIUS enters stage right. LION is resting end of stage left, where he was at the end of last scene.

KING DARIUS: (at first whispering, but then confidently) Daniel? Daniel, are you there?

KING DARIUS opens his mouth, excited to see DANIEL is alive and breathing! They embrace.

KING DARIUS: (to DANIEL) Oh, how glad I am to see you!

DANIEL: (to KING DARIUS) And I you, my king … see, my God shut the mouth of the lions (then DANIEL looks over and sees LION asleep) the lion and I am safe.

KING DARIUS: But I know who isn't … we're getting out of here.

DANIEL: (looks over at LION mournfully) Poor creature. He's just hungry.

KING DARIUS: And of course as king I will keep him fed – oh boys!

Offstage sounds of shoving and pushing are heard and after KING DARIUS and DANIEL leave stage BIGTHANA, TERESH, MERES, and HATACH are shoved in trembling and the LION slowly wakes.

LION: (to audience) And breakfast IS the most important meal of the day! (LION growls.) Thank You, God!

LION leaps toward them, and they tremble.

HIS FOUR-COURSE BREAKFAST: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!

THE END

© David Alvin 2014